Date night. When we were dating, it is easy and fun, always an adventure exploring together. When we were just married, dates happened pretty much every evening after work. We hung out, chatted over dinner, chatted about the Doctor Who episode we watched on Netflix, planned hikes for the weekend. Early on in our professional lives, the demands were lower and we the management our lives was stress-free. Add in multiple moves, children, job changes, increasing professional demands, schoolwork and the ever growing list of “chores” around the house…dating is not as simple as sitting down to dinner. Dinner isn’t usually together as a family if I am to be completely honest. Because our list of demands outside and within our family unit is ever growing, and we have to schedule date nights. That is a phase our lives, and it will change again as it did before. To stay connected to each other, to grow in our relationship with each other, we invest one night a month to Date Night In.
This month’s box was Fall In Love. The name itself is the meaning of the date – reflecting on the when, how and what when you fell in love. And upon opening the box, I will admit I got giddy. Every month before there has been a candle inside…this time, it is a make your own candle!!! Yesss! The colonial girl inside of me wanted to do this at Colonial Williamsburg, and now we had the opportunity to do it at home! The aroma beads used to make the candle were awesome and powerful. BONUS: It was very easy to make.
Part of the fun, and romantic part of the date was playing BUNCO. A dice game that every military spouse is introduced into at some point. My active duty spouse knew of it but hadn’t played. It’s a laidback dice game that allows for conversation during, and per the rules, at the end of each round the winner shared a memory from dating. These are not the topics normal conversation covers, and quite frankly we don’t normally have moments where we walk down memory lane. Reflecting on our history and remembering the moments when we fell in love creates softness and rejuvenation of the romantic part of our marriage. Marriage isn’t just about matching up the calendars or syncing email.
An extension of these dates is that we both find we are more intentional in our interactions outside of date night. While we might be rushing around on Monday morning, we take the time to actually connect eyes and say “Good morning” and “I love you.” If my former self from 10 years ago read this she would laugh and say “That seems silly.” Hear me out. There are so many other things pulling at our attention. Beyond work and the children, there is the ever-increasing demand of that phone making noise on the kitchen counter. Being intentional in the interactions in your marriage is something that builds up the marital foundations…and others are watching (kids, dog, neighbors, friends….).
If you have thought about trying a Date Night In box, check out our Instagram to enter the contest to win a box (contest ends evening of November 4th!). Or check out this link here to surprise your spouse with a date night in this holiday!